Friday, April 8, 2011
And the fear creaps in!!
I'm not going to lie knowing I have somewhere around a week or less before I'm pumped full of pitocin kinda has me shakin in my sandals!! I know this fear all to well, I'm always consumed by it as my induction date approaches, and no matter how much I want to relax and say it's coming no matter what I find myself filled with anxiety. I know I can do it, I've done it four times before. It's not fun, but you forget about most of the pain as soon as you have that baby in your arms. I've done it a couple of times completely drug free, and a couple of times with a little IV pain meds, I'm hoping this time to once again go completely drug free. She's going to be early, the IV pain meds make them a little more sluggish when they are born, I need to do everything possible to keep her out of the nicu and with me!! The problem is I've never gone into a labor saying I don't want anything, I've always left it open to whatever, so I fear I'm going to psych myself out! I don't know, anyways I know this is a normal fear and most of us deal with it, I just needed to put it out there and try to unload it a little!! I'm a walking time bomb right now, I see the Dr almost everyday and anyone of those days could be the day!! He sounds like if we get to 36 weeks we should celebrate and induce, no more waiting and worrying about this little gal!!
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